April 1, 2025 Nobody's Fool

 April is here. Now may the warm spring days be more and the cold snowy ones a fond memory.

There is no need for a drumroll for this topic today. I quit drinking. I have not counted the days, but it's been about a year and a half since. Instead of calling it a recovery, I feel it's better for me to refer to it as a significant life change.

Unlike many, I did not have a dramatic event that forced this change. There was no major health problem, behavior faux pas, criminal slip, or intervention. I simply...quit.

It was after the fact that I found how positively my life would be impacted.

Alcohol had always been a part of my life, from the days Dad would give me a "snort" of his icy beer after work, to being of legal age at 18, always present at every celebration, to becoming a crutch during Covid. That is where it, in hindsight, got out of hand.

I hid it pretty well, although the bottles accumulated at an alarming rate in the recycling. I ignored it, thinking I was okay. I was not okay.

I'd like to maintain a modicum of dignity and not share certain aspects of my drinking experience. Just looking back and wishing I'd done so many things differently was humbling enough. None of this came to light until my head was clear. That first several months of abstinence was like a curtain that was raised ever so slowly, revealing bits at a time.

I will say, it surprised me that I had no craving for a drink once I decided to stop. With the amount I was consuming, it's amazing to me. And, it does not bother me in the least when others drink around me. 

Recently, I purchased a mini fridge that now houses my nonalcoholic options. I tried them all until I landed on a brand of beer I loved, some wine options that are just okay. Beverages with adaptogens and mood-boosting alternatives don't appeal to me, despite their popularity.

Most importantly, my anxiety and depression disorder is completely under control, now that my medication does not have to fight with alcohol. I still have "off" days, but no longer dive into the diversion that whiskey or wine offered. I don't miss those calories, either!

I do lean on a supportive spouse. I do not expect him to give up his after-work toddy, but he does keep his beer and whiskey in the shop fridge. In the beginning, I felt it would be easier to not see it, which he respected. Now, it wouldn't bother me to have it in the house. I know I can leave it alone.

So, if I offended, embarrassed, bothered, or frustrated anyone during that time in my life, I sincerely apologize. Just know, now I'm a happier, healthier, more aware human being.

Thanks for understanding.☘