The Gramzie Chronicles

  As I nurse my third cup of coffee, I thought I'd check in.  Last week was torturous, as you can imagine.  I still expect him to be standing behind me in the kitchen, or snuffling me awake in the morning. I did make Randy two promises. One is that I will take the summer to see if I can live without a dog. The second is, if I decide to add another member to our family, it will not be a puppy. Interestingly enough, I've seen several posts of rescues that, if circumstances were different, I'd jump at. Being gone so much in the next couple of months would not be fair to a rescue. I want to be able to dedicate the necessary time to adapt and adjust a pup so it feels safe and secure. Fortunately, I have friends that will generously share their fur balls with me. We are looking forward to being on the road. Grand2 has a wrestling tournament this weekend, and we have a trip planned for several days next week.  We'll be back in time for another tournament! How is retirement ...

  Look at that. The sun did come up after a horrible day of loss. Under veterinarian advice and support. the day I dreaded had to be faced. His joints could no longer support his free spirit and puppy heart. He crossed the Rainbow Bridge with his head in my lap.  I'll admit, it's going to be an adjustment. No more snorting, whimpering wake ups when he felt I had had enough sleep. No looking behind me to make sure I didn't trip over him. No moving to the side going out the door to avoid being knocked out of the way. The birds and squirrels will be able to eat in peace. Randy no longer has an excuse for every strange noise or smell, or the mud nuggets tracked in from outside. No competition for the recliner. It's amazing how that small life took up so much room in the atmosphere of our home. I'm surprised it doesn't echo in here. So this morning, still in my pajamas, I wandered the backyard, filling feeders, and not worrying about dodging poop in unexpected places...

  I fear we are going to have to make an impossible decision. Rambo blew his knee out. Again. The same knee we just had repaired. For the second time.  When he had his last surgery, I was told that if this happened again, there would be nothing that could be done. On top of all of this, in spite of switching up his diet, and monitoring his frantic need to graze, he is still vomiting. His x-rays showed an enlarged spleen, but his bloodwork was all normal. Again, nothing we can do. I'm heartbroken. I can tell he's in pain, like his spark went out. As in the previous blowouts, we have no idea what caused it. Chasing squirrels? Clearing the birds from the lilacs? Did he trip over the edging? I cannot even bring myself to call the vet at this point, We have pain meds left over from surgery, so we can make him comfortable while we wrap our heads around what's happened. Be assured, we will do what is best for him, based on the vet's recommendation. It just may not be what'...

  Yes, I was an REO Speedwagon fan. At the break of morning, finding we had only a mess and no damage from last night's turbulent weather, you can imagine our relief. I know many were not as fortunate.  As I huddled in our hallway with a quilt and my book, while Randy prowled the house, I remembered being a child during violent storms. We have no basement. under our home, so we close all the bedroom doors and use the hallway. As a child, we had a massive basement for safely. Formerly used as a laundry, it was brightly lit. It's funny, I do not have a memory of ever losing power.  So there we would be, all in our pajamas, gathered in what we felt was the most protected place. Mom used to tell us not to worry because Emmetsburg had been blessed many years ago, following a disastrous storm, and there had not been one since.  There was a book that always accompanied us to the basement; it's funny how clearly I can bring it back. It was called Silly Simon, about a li...

*Warning: TMI and sense of humor needed.* I'm vigilant about screenings as it's always better, in my mind, to nip things in the bud before they develop into problems. This leads me to today, and my 10 year colon screening.  We do have family history in this niche of health issues, so I'm always nervous and anxious to get it done. Today was no exception. If you know me well, I tend to become rather inappropriate in order to laugh my way through sensitive scenerios, such as a colonoscopy. So when my nurse was taking me to the procedure room, I brought out that raucous side and asked her if it was hard, working around assholes all day. Fortunately, I read her right and she got a good giggle out of it. She was also the first face I saw when I resurfaced from the lovely propofol dream. Not to be outdone, she told me that everything had gone well and there were no polyps or signs of disease.. She then informed me that I could say, without question, I am now a perfect asshole. I w...

  Mother Nature has proven to be a real test of my patience so far this spring. I have so many things to do. Fortunately, none of it has a pending deadline. The need to be outside is paramount as it affects so many other aspects in managing my mental health. So, I'm playing by "her" rules. My mornings, while waiting for it to warm up enough to achieve anything outside, are focused on maintaining a routine. There is nothing worse, in my mind, than coming in tired from outdoor work and facing chaos when all that is wanted is a hot shower. When it gets consistently warm, it will be a struggle to not go out immediately, but it's a small problem. To date, there has been quite a lot accomplished. A laundry list of what is completed would be absolutely boring, so I'll just say it's involved a lot of paint, dirt, masonry, caulking, and resulting sore muscles. Today will be a mixed bag. I have some black dirt with which to deal, and that should not take long. I also ne...